So I am going to try and keep this short and to the point, but I need to hear from others that I am not being crazy or acting in greed.

Long story short my (ex) husband died recently, he was sick, but died unexpectedly. We haven't lived together for over 15 years, but never actually divorced. The not getting a divorce was his request, he never wanted to separate, but he was a narcissist and I couldn't take anymore. At the time I left we still had 3 minor children and he didn't want to pay child support (thus, not divorcing). He also, specifically told me that he didn't want me to divorce him and go after his 401k (this is going to be an important part of the story). He was proud of his 401k, when he died he had been with the company almost 40 years. During our marriage, when our kids were little, we would fight over his agressive 401k deposits taking money from our family. Bottom line is I went along with this because honestly, it wasn't affecting me. I was never going to marry again. All in all we have been married since 1995 so 31 years - 15 leaving together and we were together for 5 years before we got married. Bottom line, my whole life has been with this one person.

Fast forward, he dies and not only am I the SOLE beneficiary in all his assests (car, bank accounts, life insurance, & the beloved 401k) but I am also still married to him, so legally I have claim to everything. The money we are talking about here is significant, life changing money. My adult children, 5 of them, ranging from 30s to 20s, think they should get everything. I agreed to give them all the fluid cash money (bank accounts, life insurance, last pay & bonus money) but that is not enough. I explained to them the tax requirements to try and liquidate his 401k while we are still married and I am not old enough to draw it, but they weren't concerned. So I agreed to split the 401k with them as long as they agreed to pay for 1/2 the taxes (which will be several hundred thousand dollars) this is still not enough for them. They want it all, saying we weren't living together and he didn't want me to have it so I should basically give them everything.

The eldest 3 or not talking to me. They are running and telling every family member that will listen that I shouldn't get any of it!

The clock on the money is ticking, only have 30 days to decide how to handle and I am stuck. Part of me wants to stand my ground and protect myself (I live in California and would have received 1/2 of his retirement account in divorce) and the mom part of me says "it's just money and not worth killing off my relationships with my kids". HELP from a broken hearted mom in cali!

Today I was looking for a snack in my kitchen and I saw 2 apples and decided I would have one. So I went to asked my mum if l could have one, she said yes.
Now she is one of those mums who when she using her phone she forgets that the rest of the world exists, she was at the time on her phone.
Anyway I went and ate one of the apples, and I then I asked if I could have the other and she said yes again.
So I again ate my apple peacefully and then my mum came into the kitchen and asked if I left enough apples for my brother’s lunch tomorrow,
I told her I didn’t realise I need to save some for his lunch and asked how many he would need for his lunch she said he needs one for Thursday and one for Friday, bare in mind today it’s Wednesday, so I looked at her confused and said so he needed 2 apples and when i asked you i told her there was only 2 apples left, and you said I could have an apple twice so why would there be any apples left?
She looked at me annoyed and told me I need to be more thoughtful and shouldn’t take things that I haven’t asked for and basically didn’t speak to me for the rest of the day, but I’m confused because I did ask, but maybe it is my fault cause she was on her phone and I should have known she wouldn’t be paying attention and I did eat the last one?

Anyway, AITAH for eating apples?

My husband to be suggested I post here:
So background:
I 24 F and my best friend (F 22) have been friends since I started a college course a few years ago.

We did lose contact for a while but began talking again about three years ago. We’ve been through a lot together ever since. From shitty boyfriends to my pregnancy and PPD to her pregnancy and birth. I was her only friend to turn up to her baby shower even though it took me 2hrs to get there with a travel sick toddler. And until recently I thought that we were still close.
Onto the issue:
I get married on Saturday (Halloween) and she’s my maid of honour. She’s hasn’t done any of the typical maid of honour things but I understand that because she has a three month old daughter so it’s understandable that she’s been busy. She didn’t plan or come to my bachelorette party (which I didn’t mind too much) because her daughter was ill. She’s been bleeding quite heavily since the birth of her daughter which might be her PCOS but nothing (that I know of) has been confirmed.
I sent her a message on Saturday telling her how worried I was about her health and that I don’t want her to force herself to drive up to where I live while she’s bleeding heavily and suggesting that we could celebrate after when she’s not bleeding heavily. It came from a place of genuine concern for her health because bleeding for 12 weeks straight after a c-section isn’t normal. Right? I have tried explaining this to her but she feels like I don’t want her there when I do want her there since she’s my best friend. She’s not spoken to me since. So was I wrong? And am I wrong for being upset with her?

Me (33F) and my partner (38F) are in a 4-year long relationship. We have been fighting a lot since day one, and mostly because she does not feel like I ever cared for her enough, which makes her angry or dissatisfied at me very often, and in return me being frustrated by her being angry at me every other day despite me trying my best - which makes me feel I am drifting away and makes her even more insecure.
In all of this, she is having fertility issues and is telling me she wants to have kids soon - with me - but I am not sure and need the relationship to be more stable before deciding to build a family.
AITA for telling her I need to improve our relationship first? Should I just leave or be fully committed to have kids? Help.

hi, my birthday is tomorrow. I made a birthday group chat to have everyone agree on a day and location. I'm turning 22, everyone is around that age.

I'm very picky about birthdays and now I want ones that actually mean something to me and not just fun.

Most people are near where I live (20-30 mins), only one friend (let's call her Jesse) is far (40-50 mins). tomorrows a public holiday so I know everything will be jam packed.

the first location I picked was a location that's really peaceful and chill. a park next to a mall but it was far for most people 20-80 mins for Jesse. most people said it's far but they will just pay a little extra and come bcs they want to. even Jesse yes. only one friend said No. let's call her sam. Sam's reason was that her mom feels it's unsafe, even tho Sam lives around 20 mins away from that park. anywho I didn't want to be inconsiderate so I changed the location to another park that's closer.

now this park isn't as chill, it'll probably be crowded but it's a really pretty one with flowers. everyone once again said it's all good but then sam sent me a message saying once again her mom feels it's unsafe because they almost got mugged around that area once and there were weapons n stuff. (we are not in America so this is extremely illegal). that new park is 10 mins away from sam's house. I obviously can't invalidate what happened to her but I've been there multiple times and nothing happened to me. it's a pretty safe park but obviously anything could happen on any street. it's not a dangerous area overall (I mean she lives around anyway?). Sam instead was trying to convince me to go to this other park that she really likes. I told her I really like the one I picked and she said her mom says there's no way she can go there.

I hate to be this person but I genuinely really want to go there and no one else has a problem with that place but Sam. would I be the asshole if I told her she doesn't have to come ? or kicked her out instead of trying to find another solution? what can I do?

i (16m) am friends with my old ex sort of, danny (15m). danny and i have been friends for a long time and we started dating because i liked him, he was funny, and i thought he would make a good companion. well, i have a sister "tanya" (14f). danny and i actually go way back, as we knew each other vaguely since the elementary school days. he was close with tanya, i started hitting it off with danny in middle school and we got closer and closer.

well, eventually, danny and tanya drifted apart and it seemed that danny didn't want to reconnect with tanya. that itself would have been understandable, but definitely tragic for my sister since she deep down wants friends.

well, danny, after starting high school, moved into a bigger house and became this guy with a lot of friends. he started making sarcastic jokes about me sometimes and ignoring me sometimes too, as well as going "hahahaha" whenever something bad happened to me (presumably he wouldn't pay attention).

he would get mad if i didn't wanna talk to him or tell me to "just take a joke", but eventually i got mad when he started joking about my sister tanya. she's my sister, of course, and i too was bullied for having anxiety and being bad at sports, so when danny said something like "tanya doesn't do anything in gym, oh my god, why can't she even try?! no offense, but it's like she's useless and her legs don't work!!!!!"

i told him to please not say such things about my sister, but then he started laughing, telling me to take a joke yet again, that he was talking about my sister who "no one likes", not me, and even telling me i'd have more friends (even though i do have friends, it's just the popular kids who don't pay attention to me) if i wasn't "so sensitive".

i didn't want to start a further argument, so i just didn't say anything, and it was time for me to leave the hangout soon anyway so i left. i'm still pretty upset. he'll act like we're friends one minute and then like this the next.

hi, so i wasnt confronted about this or anything and ive never written one of these but i hope y’all will listen and help me decide how to feel abt this.

so i was walking home through the dollar tree parking lot when this kid (around my age) slams another kid (around my age) into the wall of dollar tree, he had jumped off of his skateboard and it was in my way and i just overall felt weird abt it— I could tell they were familiar with eachother, i think they were friends (?) but impulsively when i walked past, his skateboard HAPPENED to be in my way.

i wasnt trying to send it backwards, i meant to kick it forward but my foot landed in the middle of it and i kicked back because those soccer instincts did NOT kick in.

I do feel guilty for it— but it was in a parking lot and they were close enough to most likely reach it before it went into the road + barely anyone comes into the parking lot since there’s a bigger one infront of the area.

AITA or was this just a mistake?

I (M19) have been growing out my hair for 4 years. I love my hair and hate drastic changes, so I haven’t want to cut ANY of it off. I’ve had nightmares about cutting my hair and feeling sad and after waking up I was upset. My hair means A LOT to me. My mom’s been constantly changing her opinion from “your hair is so beautiful don’t cut it” to “cut your hair already you’ll look better, or at least cut off some inches to strengthen it”. We have a coworker(F35) who I’ve been friends with for a while, and she’s also friends with my mom. They’ve been joking around saying “I’ll cut your hair while you aren’t looking”. My coworker, let’s call her Linda, has been telling me to get a haircut. She’s been joking around a lot by grabbing scissors and making a move to cut my hair. She’s has also asked me “if I cut your hair, would you ever speak to me again?” at least 5 times, in which I always responded with “I’d stop talking to you”. A couple hours ago, I was at the shop to use the ethernet to fix something on her kid’s laptop. As I was standing over the laptop on the workbench, she took a pair of scissors and put it around my hair, as she often does. At that point I was focused on the laptop and didn’t think she’d cut my hair as she’s so often just joking. “ SHE CUT YOUR HAIR!” her kids yelled. I thought they were joking, I didn’t hear or feel anything. I turned around and Linda was holding 3 inches of my hair. My heart fell to my ass. I got my hair, put it in my pocket, and turned back to the laptop. She tried talking to me but I ignored her. Her kids(6 & 9)who really like me, were confused. They said “why aren’t you talking to her?”. Linda asked about what she did, the kids defended me and said “You shouldn’t have done it, he likes his hair, everyone is different, you can’t force him to have short hair”. After about 5 minutes of trying on the laptop, I gave up, told my brother who was waiting for me: “wanna go?”, he said yes, so I left the laptop and got in my car. The kids followed me, saying “where are you going aren’t we going to play?” I calmy told them “I have to go home”. Linda stood in front of my car door, not letting me close it, and asked “are you really mad at me for that?” I didn’t answer. I nudged the door a bit and Linda stepped aside, letting me shut it. Now I’m home. Linda has been DMing me saying that she was sorry and that she did it as a joke. I haven’t been responding. My mother told me that Linda has been messaging her, that she and the kids are crying, that the kids are saying that they’ll never talk to her again, that her husband got upset with her, and that the kids are writing me a letter in case I don’t go to their house again. My mom is saying that I’m wrong for not responding and leaving her family and kids a mess over hair. I don’t feel comfortable talking to her as I am really stubborn and she also hurt me. Am I the asshole for letting her family turn against her as a result of my silence towards her?

I (F30) have been with my boyfriend (M32) since I was 18. Six of those years were long-distance — him in France, me in North Africa. Our civil wedding is next week; married, I'll be able to apply for my visa to join him.

The latest fight is about a dress and a ring. I know how that sounds — but I'm not upset about just those anymore.

The dress. I can't order from abroad, so he agreed to order my wedding dress; I'd pay him back. I reminded him three nights straight; each time he asked me to resend the links, promising to order "tomorrow." Weeks later: nothing — my links were "too long and complicated." Delivery overlapped his flight home. When I got upset, he blamed me for sending "too long and complicated" links.

The ring. On his own, he showed me a €900 diamond ring he wanted to buy. I was happy — though I didn't like the shape, so I sent him one I liked: pictures and a link (€1,200, with the option to downsize the stone). A week after the dress argument, I asked about it, and he told me angrily I'd get "a regular ring like everyone else" (€450, moissanite).

A few days later, he said it was temporary — we'd pick the real one in France; he was "afraid I wouldn't like his pick." I agreed. Then: "I'm not in the mood anymore" — his friends advised against diamonds, and I was supposedly throwing our future away over a ring.

Days later, I called again: his parents bought him a house, he wants to repay them with a car (they're 80), and his savings won't cover car, wedding, ring and honeymoon. He "wouldn't have suggested a diamond" if he'd done the math earlier. He asked me to save for the wedding. I was already saving for the dress, hair, makeup. His solution: rewear my €70 civil-wedding dress, do my own makeup. I've waited 12 years for this day. I work in a call center; he makes 7x my salary.

Had he calmly said it wasn't in his budget, I'd have understood. What hurt: changing the plan without discussion, then making me feel shallow for caring.

AITA for getting upset about these things?

TL;DR: He promised a diamond ring and a honeymoon in Bali. Weeks before our civil wedding, he delayed my wedding clothes, downgraded the ring to a €450 moissanite "like everyone else," and got angry when I was hurt. AITA for getting upset over a ring and a dress?

TLDR: I work in an industry that requires 2 years of training, I got this job when I was 17 and have been doing it almost 10 years, and I am now an instructor.

So me (M26), teaching this training had a student (F31), who was the most exceptionally beautiful woman I had seen in my entire life, once she graduated and left the school I asked if she wanted to hang out, she came over. I threw on a record, gave her a house tour, and we yapped and had a few tasty beverages (at some point during the evening, I admitted I had a crush on her). At the end of the night she says she wants to go to bed, I offer my room immediately and I’ll sleep on the couch, as it feels appropriate. She’s happy about this and takes the bed, the next morning she wakes me up and says bye with a smile.

After this, I text to see how she’s doing with no response. After prying with a few “hey, what’s up” type texts, I get told “don’t try and date students, it’s weird”

I think since I’m no longer her teacher, and that she’s a good bit older than me it’s not that weird, but I still feel gross after being told that. Thanks all.

My(M) wife and I are friends with a small group of parents from our kids school. We've gotten to know them and others for the past 2 years. Our friend here who have gotten to be good friends with my wife is a person who likes to touch or show affection that way. Before we get any further, there is nothing going on, my wife and I have access to our phones and emails, messenger, where each one is, etc...

But for the past half year, they've just gotten more physically affectionate in a group setting or even when both husbands are around. Some of these include longer than usual hugs, cuddling each other from behind, and swaying, caressing each other's back or arm, random middle school style slow dancing, head on shoulder, sharing a bed and cuddling in a hotel room that they shared with two other moms, etc...? Like you would think that they are the couple.

Now I know and maybe this is stereotypical, but women are just more comfortable doing that whether in a group setting or not.

AITH for setting boundaries with my Wife on some of that stuff? Like if you want to hug, that's fine, but all the other stuff? Just made me uncomfortable. My wife and I spoke on this and I shared my thoughts on it and set the boundary, which she mentioned she felt bad that it made me feel that way but now I'm starting to think I'm in the wrong. AITAH?

Hi, I’m in my fall semester of my junior year of college (22F) and it’s also the first semester living with my roommate (also 22F). We sorta knew each other last year and hung out a few times but we both learned we were looking roommates and figured living together would be better than trying to get a random roommate off of Facebook. Everything has been more or less good except for this problem. As some more context, my roommate (let’s just call her Marissa) is a cheerleader at our college. And I’m pretty busy with other clubs and my research lab. This means we don’t typically see each other in the apartment, which is totally fine.

When we first moved in, we set ground rules for having people other, chores, etc. We also set rules about eating each other’s food. While I didn’t care too much about sharing, Marissa seemed to care more, so we decided that we’d largely keep our own supplies of food minus basic cooking ingredients (butter, flour, spices…). We both kept our snacks and other food in their respective places in the common kitchen.

About a month ago, I realized I was going through by snacks a lot faster than I should have, particularly my ice cream. I briefly had the suspicion that Marissa may have been eating some of it, but I had never seen her being ice cream in our apartment or buy any herself, so I figured she didn’t like the stuff. Either way, I’m not a confrontational person so I just moved my snacks and ice cream to my room (I have a mini-fridge and some extra drawers). Despite moving it, it was still depleting very quickly so eventually I just chalked it up to my own snacking habits and tried limiting them a bit and such. The rate slowed and I figured that was the problem.

Well, last night when we were watching a movie together, Marissa, while munching on some popcorn, joking patted her stomach and said something along the lines of “ugh I need to work out more. Weigh ins showed I had gained a few pounds.” I was trying to be supportive to her so I said something back like “oh I’m sure that it’s just water weight or something.” Marissa laughed and made a comment back like “either that or I’m just getting fat off all the ice cream I eat.” Here’s the thing, Marissa has never had her own ice cream tub in the freezer nor do I think she would frequently go out to get ice cream. I didn’t know what to say in response and we just continued watching like normal.

But now I’m seconding guessing all of the “going fast” through my snacks and ice cream. Like I said, I’m not a confrontational person so I’m trying to figure out if I should say something to her. It’s also tricky cause it’s tied to her weight, which could be a touchy subject, and I don’t want to make her upset. Like for all I know, she has her own mini-fridge with loads of ice cream in her room. Any advice or thoughts would be appreciated!!

Had an unfortunate experience today.

I was in a public toilet today (F) in a rural area, so no attenders/staff,

A tourist was in the female toilets with 3 teenage sons.

I told them firmly that this was a female toilet and that they should not be in there.

The woman glared at me and said something in her own language.

I mentioned this to a friend of mine, who said it was more than likely a cultural difference.

AITA for telling male tourists that they should not be using female toilets?

ADDENDUM — the following information has been requested by commenters -

In the UK, male and female toilets are standard. There was a male toilet in working use.

The 3 teenagers were 13 plus, two had moustaches, they were absolutely not butch looking girls, and no obvious disabilities.

A friend of mine invited me and some other friends, most of them mutual, to a restaurant, with the occasion of his birthday. It wasn't a super fancy restaurant, it was more like a pub, but that's not very important.

Most of us ordered a burger. It wasn't the type of burger you can't possibly fit in your mouth, it was a normal size for a restaurant burger. I noticed that everyone started to eat it with cutlery. I found it a little weird, but I didn't say anything and proceeded to eat it with my hands.

Everything was nice until we left the restaurant. One of my friends took me to the side and told me that it wasn't ok that I eat the burger with the hand. "We were at a sit-down restaurant, not at a fast food. We were given cutlery for a reason." I told him that the burger was made to be eaten with the hand so I don't consider I did anything wrong. Then my friend told me that I should have eaten with cutlery anyway since everyone else did it, and that I was looking like a savage and out of place within our group.

AITA?

Some background information. Me (25M) and my sister, let's call her Sally (21F) have a non-existent relationship. We don't talk at all, as several years ago Sally decided that she hated me for no reason at all. Now, for the incident that happened yesterday. My family has an extra running fridge in our garage that has food that won't fit in the fridge inside, and my breakfast muffins are in the garage fridge. So I was going to go get one of the muffins for breakfast and went over to the door leading towards the garage. The door didn't look like it was open, and right when I was about to reach out to grab it, Sally came pushing the door open with force. It almost hit me, and she just walked right past me without so much as a spare glance my way.

This is the part where I feel I may be the AH. Without thinking, the words "That was rude" came out of my mouth. I didn't intend for it to happen, our relationship is already non-existent, I didn't want to somehow make it worse. (If a non-existent relationship CAN get worse...) That caused Sally to tell our Mom (70 F) about how I called her rude, and our Mom viewed me calling her rude as disrespectful. It turned into an argument, because to both Mom and Sally, I called her rude when Sally was just simply helping clean out the basement. I didn't know until a few minutes after I called Sally rude, but apparently she was going back and forth to the basement to the garage to carry boxes to the car, and of course, she wasn't aware that I was on the other side of the door. I did try to acknowledge that in part of the argument, but no one would listen to my side.

I still feel like most people would say something, like "Oops, sorry I didn't see you there!" because at the very least, me and my parents would do that if we were in Sally's position. But yet, I am the disrespectful one for calling her rude when I was almost hit by a door?

I don't understand it, but anyway, AITA?

I(F) 19 years old, have been practically raised by my stepmother we will call her annalise. Annalise met my dad a long time ago and she was in and out of our lives. She taught me how to walk and took care of me as a baby. i always called her a nickname like my father did, like Anna. I never called her mom and she never expected me to when I was a child. Growing up with her was strange. my father was abusive and she didn’t do anything about it. Ive never blamed her for that, though she sort of was just existing. I don’t remember a lot of Familial moments with her. When I got older, my father died, it was strange especially since I was unsure whether I would have to go back to my mom who I hadn’t seen since I was a baby. She ended up keeping me and taking care of me. I am very grateful for that, but when I say “take care of“ I mean in the most basic ways one can. She clothed me and fed me, and that’s about it. I never felt the bond of a mother from her, and there had always been a clear line in her care of me vs her actual children. For years I tried not to think much of it, I mean I suppose I can understand the bond being different if you’re blood related. But things grew more tense as I got older, she continues to compare me to my father (a alcoholic abuser) and says I’m not doing anything with my life. In the same breath she uses to criticize me, she wonders why im the only one who doesn’t call her mother. Yet when she we are all together, her subtle dislike towards me compared to my siblings (her actual kids) is always so clear. so I’m not sure, AITA for not calling mom?

just to clear some air just in case, I’m currently trying to go to school but can’t for a number of reasons. I did drink when I was living with college friends but have never been a heavy drinker. I’m not a trouble kid, just one trying to figure their life out but I’m pretty poor so it’s taking longer then most.

I love to give crafts for the holidays especially since I have my own children and money can be tight. I never care if people put them up, keep them or anything. I gave my MIL crafts for years - kids handprints, etc. She told me 3 years ago that she is not interested in my crafts and would like to stop receiving them. It hurt but by all means, I didn't want to be a burden. So the next Christmas, I craft things for my bro and sis in laws (we buy toys for our nieces and nephews) and my MIL keeps making comments that we didn't get them anything, that she felt left out. I explained that she didn't want my crafts so what do you want me to do? And she said "buy something". Well, fast forward to last year and needless to say I crafted something. She was pissed and threw it away and told me "i told you I do not want this crap". Now we are getting close to Christmas, AITAH for thinking about crafting again and not buying.

I have a milestone birthday around the corner. My girlfriend came up with the idea of a big party at a hall and she's going to cover the cost. A few years ago, I threw a small family gathering at our home for her milestone birthday and invited a lot of her family over. Her birthday is in the same month and so is her father's. My father's is as well and it'll be a milestone for him as well (I'm 20 years younger than my father). At first, she wanted it to be centered around me, but I told her I wouldn't mind if we honored both our fathers as well and it only made sense to toss her in as well.

We began sending out invites through a website, but didn't think to specify only +1 for each. One person on her side responded with five more people in addition to her. I have sort of met the other five people, but I wouldn't by any stretch say I know them. It grates me that this person is taking such blatant advantage of an invite and a couple other people have included more than one person aside from themselves.

We picked a venue together and decided on a place for the catering and we're going to pick up the food to avoid a delivery fee. But one of the sides is potato salad. I HATE potato salad and she knows this.

I don't mind things not being all about me in the slightest. If you find me in a room full of people, I'm probably somewhere off to the side in the smallest circle of people possible. I do not like being the center of attention.

I'm starting to feel like I don't want this party to be for me. I'd much rather do something small that is specifically focused on me and just involves the two of us and not this giant thing with people I don't know with food I won't eat. This may sound like ingratitude, but please let me highlight a few things.

I'm a Christmas baby. For anyone born near the end of December, you'll understand how I was short-changed when it came to birthdays. As an adult, I don't want all the fireworks, necessarily, but I do want to feel special on my special day.

I also have anxiety and I've been torturing myself with guilt because she's footing the bill. I wouldn't mind going to this party, I just don't want my name slapped on it. It doesn't feel like it's about me at all.

If it were a just a general party, I wouldn't have any issue. I just went to someone else's party that had food I didn't care for and I had a great time. I want to enjoy this, but the idea that this is a party for me is making me feel like the child who received Christmas/birthday hybrid gifts. It's making me feel like an afterthought rather than the reason for the party.

I'm absolutely not going to complain to her about any of this. My girlfriend is a wonderful woman who makes me feel special every day of the week and treats me in ways I never thought I'd experience until I'd met her. The best I could hope for is making her feel half as good as she does for me. I feel guilty as hell.

​

I (24F) live in a Latin American Country which recently had its elections. Ihave a boyfriend, and recently I took an Uber on my way to a class. During the ride, the driver was playing a song criticizing a certain party and asked if I minded him leaving it on. I said I didn't mind, since I share the same views and we started talking a little about politics and other things (I am a PoliSci bachelor).

The conversation did not involce flirting in any way. He was mostly asking questions, and I was answering and keeping the conversation going with small talk, as I normally would. I wasn't interested in him (honestly he was quite annoying a but since I was in someone's car I always try to be polite).

When we arrived at the place where I take my classes, he stopped the car outside and asked for my phone number. I gave it to him, even though I had no interest in him whatsoever.

The reason I gave it to him is that, in that moment, I didn't feel comfortable saying no. I was alone at night in the car with a complete stranger, and I didn't know how he would react if I rejected him. I didn't want to risk making him angry or creating an uncomfortable or potentially unsafe situation while I was still in his car. I also didn't explicitly tell him that I had a boyfriend, because I felt like I couldn't comfortably turn him down at that moment.

Afterward, he texted me, but I ignored his messages and deleted them. He continued texting me, so I eventually blocked him.

My boyfriend knows what happened and told me he doesn't have a problem with it and understands why I reacted that way. However, when I discussed the situation with some older members of my family, they said that giving another man my number was disrespectful to my boyfriend and that I should have simply said no and made it clear that I wasn't interested.

Now I'm questioning myself. I understand why someone might see giving my number to another man as inappropriate when I'm in a relationship, but I genuinely wasn't interested in the driver. I wasn't trying to pursue anything with him, and I cut off contact as soon as it became clear that he wanted something from me.

So, AITA for giving him my number because I felt uncomfortable rejecting him directly? Was I being disrespectful to my boyfriend, or is it understandable to prioritize your safety and avoid confronting a stranger when you're in a vulnerable situation?

For context:

I (28F) have a group chat with my girl friends. One of my friends started seeing a new dude after getting out of a relationship with someone who was absolutely shitty to her (and she’s way out of his league). He happens to be one of my customers (I’m a bartender). So I mentioned that I don’t know anything about the dude besides “he’s fiiiiiine (smirk emojis) get it girl!!”

My boyfriend (28M) saw that text, said it was disrespectful and when I tried to explain myself he told me to fuck off and stormed out. He didn’t even hear me out.

Idk how to post screenshots of the text but idk. I wasn’t trying to be disrespectful? My friend literally told me they fucked and I was trying to be supportive and hype her up.

AITAH?

EDIT: he wasn’t going through my phone. We were making plans for a party him and I were both invited to and he was looking over my shoulder when he saw that text.

EDIT AGAIN: because I think I made it sound like I was calling my friend ugly?

Me (F 56) and my husband (M 62) have been together over 25 years now. He has a daughter who is in her 40s.  My son’s are adults in their 30s. My husband has been active and raising them since they were young when we got together. He has a good relationship with my sons. His daughter was 18 when we got together and married. His daughter never seemed to want a relationship with me (met her <5 and never her husband), which is fine.  My husband has seen his daughter’s husband since their wedding.  He got a call two weeks ago from his daughter that her and her husband wanted to come for a visit. This was the first time he had talked to his daughter in a year.
His relationship with his daughter is complicated. At most, he exchanges text messages with her maybe 3 to 4 times a year that are a couple of lines in length. He might talk to her on the phone once every year year and a half. My husband definitely bears part of the responsibility for their relationship being complicated.

When he first brought up her visit, he told me they would be getting a hotel and just visit for the day. However, after talking to her, he said that she told him that they don’t usually stay anywhere when they go on vacation. I guess they just sleep in their car. He said that he could not live with the idea of her sleeping in her car when we have a guest room.

Lots of complicated backstory too. My husband and I were from a small Midwestern town (live along the coast now).  When my husband and I got together, he had been separated for three years, but only recently divorced.

His ex-wife also lived in the small town.  I have never met her, but was told she did a lot of things to try and make their daughter actively dislike her father.  His ex-wife also did some things using her access to a public venue to hurt one of my children at a very vulnerable time.  I still have questions as to whether or not his daughter was involved with us, but have decided to let it go. His daughter is close with her mother and her mother has lived with her most of the time.

My husband struggles with healthy boundaries. 

So back to his daughter‘s visit. She apparently is coming in on a Saturday and staying until Sunday. She texted “I will be in on Saturday and I do not know when we are leaving“. Maybe just meant that she didn’t know what time she is leaving on Sunday. I am worried because of what I have seen of his families level of intrusiveness. He does not know his daughter, and he definitely does not know her husband. I know the boys stay for longer but we have a relationship with them. I am worried that when the time comes he will not address the fact that they need to leave. I don’t want to be that bad guy but I will be that bad guy who says you need to leave when I’m pushed in a corner. So AITAH if I tell her it’s time to go if my husband doesn’t?  

this isn’t that big of a deal, nor is it something scandalous so i don’t really expect a lot of people to be interested in this story but if you’re reading, hello ! thanks for setting aside the time :)

i play games with my bf. he’s pretty good at most games and way smarter than me too. whenever we play a board/card game, console or online game, he beats me maybe 80% of the time.

it gets a lil tiring to lose all the time because sometimes i start a game knowing that im going to lose but i cant avoid playing games with him for the rest of my life because he’s my bf after all. i love this man to death but sometimes i feel hurt and discouraged each time we play. i mean, im glad he’s not going easy on me or giving me pity wins but it sucks to suck yk ?

he never gets mad when he loses and always talks about how games aren’t something worth getting mad about which i agree with but i keep getting hurt whenever i lose because its basically back to back. whenever i bring up the fact that he’s good and i keep losing, he tells me that there are games that i win at too and that im better than him in games but that’s genuinely not the case and it just feels like he’s lying to me just to make me feel better.

anyways, yesterday we were playing a game and i just kept losing 9 rounds in a row and it hurt. i get it, im a sore loser. i wanted to just go off on him and tell him that i didnt want to play any more games with him because i kept losing but at the same time, i didnt want to hurt his feelings or act irrationally and be childish over something so minimal. is it rational for me to feel this way or am i really just being a sore loser and id be an asshole for going off on him just because, idk, skill issue and all that…

and i know it’s not fair if i went off on him for something that isnt his fault but how do i resolve this ? what should i do ? i’m conflicted on how i should feel and whether im being unreasonable, unfair and all that…

I (20F) live with two roommates, and one of them has extremely high standards when it comes to cleanliness. She gets annoyed over the smallest messes and tends to clean things immediately instead of giving anyone else a chance to do it. She then complains that she’s the one doing all the cleaning. It’s gotten to the point where I barely use our kitchen because I’m worried about upsetting her.

Recently, we had a disagreement about my long-distance boyfriend visiting. He lives 2.5 hours away with his parents while looking for a job, so he usually comes to me. We originally agreed on one visit a month, but later agreed to twice a month (around 5 nights total). Now she’s changing her mind because she says she’d been drinking when she agreed.

The thing is, she’s admitted that my boyfriend isn’t messy and has no issue with him personally. She just thinks that if I can’t clean up after myself, I shouldn’t be having guests over.

When I asked what I wasn’t cleaning, her only complaint was that I don’t wipe down the kitchen counters enough. This was the first time she’d mentioned it, and I rarely even cook in our kitchen. I generally clean up after myself, but I don’t wipe down surfaces if I haven’t visibly dirtied them.

My other roommate completely disagrees with her. She thinks I’m very tidy, contribute to household chores, and says my boyfriend actually does a great job cleaning up when he’s here. She’s also the one who shares a bathroom with us and has no issues with him visiting.
I understand wanting a clean apartment, and I’m happy to wipe down the counters more often now that I know it’s an expectation. But I feel like her standards are so specific that anything less is considered unacceptable, and now she’s using that to decide whether I deserve to have guests.

Everyone I’ve talked to agrees with me, but they’re mostly friends and family, so I’m worried they’re biased. I’d really appreciate some outside opinions.

Am I being unreasonable, or is it unfair for my roommate to restrict my guests over something like this?

Was recently on a 12 day cruise with my partner. Part way through the cruise we heard at lunch time that we would be passing under a historically significant bridge during the night. My partner and I briefly talked about how interesting it would be to see, neither of us made a firm plan to see it.

I had already arranged with my partner that I would need to be away from the cruise stateroom at 11pm to take an important call with my parents estate attorney. My partner wasn't feeling well for the previous day or two and we were both jet lagged, so I said goodnight to him and that I would try to be quiet when I came in. He said he would probably be up and not to worry about being loud.

I took the call, sent my partner a message on the ships chat messaging system that I was finishing up and would be coming back soon, and asked if he needed anything. I then spent a few minutes typing up notes from the call. When I finished, I looked up and realized we were passing under the bridge.

I checked the chat, and had no response from my partner. So I went to the bathroom and then went outside and, here's where I might be an asshole, took a selfie under the bridge before going back to the room.

When I got back my partner was fully dressed, waiting for me, and looking agitated. He said he had turned on the ship tv, seen that were passing under the bridge, and was going out to see it. I said, I know! And showed him the selfie.

He stormed out and was livid that I had done that without him. I didn't understand why he was so mad because he didn't ever respond to my message, although he said he received it. He said I should have come straight in the room to wake him up so we could go together and that I should have known to do that since he had mentioned wanting to see it and it was horribly inconsiderate of me to take a selfie without him.

Reddit, I understand his feelings were hurt. But I did try to consider him by messaging him to see if he needed anything. He didn't respond! AITA?

AITA for refusing to cover my coworker’s weekend on-call hours after they’ve repeatedly refused to cover mine? My job at a small business requires we all cover the phones every three or four weekends for new jobs that come in.

My coworker has asked me to cover their weekend on-call phone hours multiple times, and I’ve covered for them before. I’ve also asked them to cover for me a few times, but their answer has always been no.

They recently asked me to cover another weekend. I already had plans to be out of town, so I declined and explained that I wouldn’t be available.

They got upset and told me I wasn’t being a team player. They told me that they always cover for me at work and do more than their share. I don't think that's true.

I understand that being on call can interfere with weekend plans, and I’m willing to help sometimes. But I don’t think it’s fair to criticize me for declining when I have plans, especially when they’ve never agreed to cover for me.

AITA for refusing to cover their hours?