I want to end my life.
I’m a single mom to a six-year-old little girl, and I’m raising her all by myself. She recently met her dad for the first time, even though he never showed any interest in her before. Yes, she has me, and she has my family too. But I have no one. I’ve felt unwanted my entire life. Even before I was born, my own mother didn’t want me. She only kept me because it was too late to have an abortion.
Nobody takes me seriously. I can’t find someone to love me, someone to build a life with, and I’m turning 25 in a few days. I’m always dealing with everything on my own. I have no one to share my worries with, no one to lean on when things get hard. There’s no one waiting for me at the end of the day. No place where I truly feel wanted or like I belong.
And please, don’t tell me I’m playing the victim, because I’m not. This is genuinely how my life feels, and I’m tired of pretending otherwise.

Nobody hugs me and tells me it’s going to be okay. Nobody asks if I’m okay and actually wants to hear the answer.
I’ve overcome a serious gambling addiction, and I don’t even miss it anymore. I have a good job, I make good money, and I have an amazing, healthy daughter. I know I have things to be grateful for, and I truly am grateful for her. But despite everything I have, I still feel like something is missing. Something I can’t seem to find no matter how hard I try. For the past three years, I’ve felt nothing but emptiness. I have no real emotional support. And instead of lifting me up, my own parents sometimes tear me down and make me feel like I’m worth absolutely nothing.
I’m tired of having to handle everything on my own. I’m tired of always being the strong one. I’m tired of having nobody to turn to when I’m the one who needs help.
I don’t want money, success, or material things to fill this emptiness. I just want to feel loved. I want someone to care about me, to hold me when I’m not okay, to tell me that I’m going to be alright. I want someone who chooses me, who stays, and who makes me feel like I matter.
I’m so tired of feeling like I have to face this entire world on my own.

Since I’m a guy no one really cares but because of medications that I had to take, I developed gynecomastia (man boobs).

I was bullied, harassed and touched there every day, they laughed at me, groped me and just treated like I’m nothing. I was too much of a coward to fight back, so I just took it all

Now, I can’t even look at myself in the mirror, my relationship with food is messed up, I feel pathetic and disgusting just seeing myself.
I deserve this for being weak

For context, I'm having a very stressful period working on an academic project. Mentally speaking, I have Always been a mess. I Don't have much friends, and they're not even that close. I take work very seriously since it's the only thing going well in my life. But it's stressing me out, and due to my depression i sometimes spend days without doing any progres which makes my anxiety and my mental health even worse.

I can't do therapy, but I want to get better. So, a friend suggested I start having Something to look for, so I started watching a series. It worked well for a while, I'm trying to work less and have time to Watch it and it's Something i look for at the end of the day.

But, somehow I developped an unhealthy attachement to one of the characters, because I see myself in them (they are a mess, unhappy, suffer from addiction). I Don't know what I feel about them, it's like connection, empathy, and also a huge love for their character.

Now, I can't even go through the day without thinking about them constantly. It's very complicated and I can't even describe what I feel about them. but it's CRAZY DEEP. Maybe that's how obsession feels ? I have no idea.

The series are about to end and I'm scared to death, I won't have anything to get me through the day. I'm scared of not finding another distraction. I feel like a have a huge void in my soul that can't be filled and I dont know what to do about it.

If I don't want to experience life anymore, isn't it fair to question whether I should be obligated to continue? I'm not talking about whether my future will be better or worse. I'm questioning the expectation that I must keep living simply because I already exist.

The circumstances I'm living in make me feel like I'm constantly struggling just to survive. Sometimes, I feel like I'm not capable of surviving in this society as a human being. The expectations, the pressure, and the reality of life feel like more than I can handle.

I never chose to be born, yet I'm expected to adapt, survive, and keep going regardless of what I experience.

I used to be such an upbeat guy, you know? I used to be the sort of person who fired people up to keep going and never quit. Even when I was dealing with my own mess, I always found a way to encourage others. And then everything just shattered, and now I am the only one left cleaning up the pieces. It hurts so bad, it hurts like hell.

Ever since 2024, my life has just gone into a tailspin, and everything I tried to build for myself turned to zero. I was born into a poor family and honestly thought I could pull us out of it, but I finally realized I just can't, no matter what I do. I took out a huge loan to buy a house for my mom because we had been renting for the past twenty-something years. My dad didn't really contribute much and has a drinking problem. I had to watch physical abuse all through my childhood, and on top of that, I wasn't even good at school.

Then I got this dream of becoming a musician, but it never really happened because I had to live a double life. One half was the music guy, and the other half was just flipping burgers. Over the years, I picked up some skills on my own and managed to land regular jobs, but my heart was never really in them, so I could never fully commit. I figured I would make it as a musician, and I wasn't being delusional about it either. I was just a normal guy who wanted to earn a living through music so I could finally get out of survival mode. I never wanted a big fancy mansion, a Ferrari, or some supermodel girlfriend, not a single bit of that. I just wanted to escape survival mode while doing what I actually love.

I am thirty-four years old now, and I have seen how the world really works. Pretty privilege is totally real, rich privilege is real, and no matter how hard you try, you just cannot beat raw power or someone with generational wealth. People will use you up, chew you out, and then totally forget about you.

I bought that house for my mom because every single time I looked at her, her eyes were welling up with tears just wishing for a place of her own. I took out a loan and got her the exact house she wanted, which meant I had to sacrifice a whole lot of things. But I thought it would make her happy, and since I still had a job back then, I felt confident enough to ask out the girl I liked. I told her I was completely serious about our future. She understood where I was coming from and didn't yell at me, but she still said no.

Then my best friend of five years started acting super cold toward me right after I got laid off. I had to cut him completely out of my life, and it has been over a year since we last spoke.

Now I have literally zero money left, no friends, and my family just looks at me like a total loser because I am not bringing in any cash anymore. It is not like things were ever great before, oh no. Things have always been pretty rough for me, but I somehow managed to get by. All those years, I just scraped by without any money, without a partner, without any support, or even a single kind word.

I am not trying to play the victim here, no way. I have had to hit the reset button over and over again. Every single job I lost, every single opportunity that slipped through my fingers, and all the people who looked down on me, I always told myself it did not matter because I still had a dream to chase.

But now that dream is completely gone, too, so I honestly do not know what to do. Those dark thoughts are creeping back in, and I might just end it all once and for all.

32 years old, male. Living in Japan, Asian.
I was diagnosed with moderate depression in 2018. At that time, I needed to take medication every day to stabilize my emotions. Later, after I traveled abroad once, my depression improved, but I know it was never completely cured.
Now I feel that I’ve learned to coexist with depression. Occasionally, I still experience sudden emotional lows and physical symptoms, such as chest tightness, shortness of breath, acid reflux, burping, loss of appetite, and not wanting to eat anything. Sometimes I can only drink water, feel exhausted, and just want to lie down and rest.
Although I can now manage my daily life, I feel lonely whenever night falls. Because I’ve been single for a long time, my emotions can sometimes be unstable. I no longer get angry easily, but I still tend to feel disappointed, lonely, and sad.
I don’t know if there is anyone in a similar situation who would be willing to go through these difficulties together with me.
I’m not a scammer. I’m looking for a sincere relationship, one where we can understand and heal each other.
I hope everyone can gradually get better, too. I’m also trying hard to fight depression, but sometimes it’s really difficult and lonely…

I’m a 40 year old white male. I have a wife and kid. Own a house and car. I have decent job. All this and I still have thoughts of ending it every day. I have had these thoughts for as long as I can remember. I am medicated now but it only slowers the waves if that makes sense. I have alienated all of my closest friends. I am able to still put on the fake face when I’m at work or in public but it is increasingly exhausting. I know a lot of my issues are self inflicted but I still don’t know how to get past them. When i do get a glimmer of hope or delusion of grandeur, i am quickly brought back down through anxiety or failure. The cycle seems endless and continues to sink me down further and further.

Sorry, just needed to put the thoughts in the world.

I'm 44, disabled, and they denied my disability. I'm supposed to magically become able to get work, and while i've somewhere to live, it's in rural america, I can't leave the house, and i can't sit in a chair for more than an hour without pain. I just don't know what to do anymore. I genuinely want to kill myself because I don't see a way out anymore.

If anyone has any advice, or just words for me.. I'd appreciate it.

I have a total lack of a self-preservation instinct. Showering, brushing my teeth, exercise, all that stuff is hard but I can deal with that.

The ONE thing I can’t manage at all is how to maintain basic nutrition. It’s been years now where it’s rare to get even one meal a day. The impact is obviously horrible. I’m extremely underweight, weak, and terribly exhausted all the time.

Thankfully I don’t have any type of disordered eating, just a total lack of appetite. Something about the depression makes the taste/texture of food overwhelming, to the point where I usually have to force myself to chew and swallow. Most of the time, I feel like I’d rather be hungry than deal with it.

I’m really looking for advice here, I need to figure this out!

At the moment, I do not have someone to hold close to me nor someone to comfort me.

I need to feel a hug, a cuddle or just warmth from someone, but that is not feasible so please drop your tips and tricks on how to feel human warmth alone and by myself, because honestly I have been thinking of letting go.

Please do not focus much on the leaving the world thing, I just need to how to be hugged again, alone and without anyone.

I’m sure you can guess the kind of predicament I am in, so do not say that ‘reach out to someone’ or ‘love yourself and stop hating the face in the mirror’. If that is all that you have to say, I would suggest you to use your valuable time elsewhere.

I’ve been depressed for the last 2 years of my life. And it truly sucks! Every day feels painful and I feel like I’m a pathetic burden or a screw up. Everyone around me keeps saying stuff like find new methods to cope or cope. I’ve been trying to cope! I think my life is genuinely worthless. Is it worthless? I feel so worthless and I just wished my love ones would understand how much pain I’m in constantly. Part of me just wants people to actually understand the pain I’m going through or understand that I can’t just be happy immediately. They want me to be happy but it’s hard, I haven’t been able to be truly happy for years. I just don’t know! Am I genuinely pathetic and a burden or will people understand my pain and mental anguish? Or will they never understand?

i am genuinely sick and tired of people giving me unsolicited advice (esp since a lot of it is toxic positivity as well) and how ignorant everyone is about why its rude. this is one of the reasons why i almost killed myself a year and a half ago and one of the reasons why i’m still depressed. every time i tell people about why these things are bad they either can’t wrap their head around it or they bully me for it, and it’s completely unfair, especially due to the amount of evidence online that supports me. all i want and am looking for is for people to understand that and stop being so ignorant about it, but if that doesn’t even happen, then what else am i supposed to do?

tw: grief, parent death

my mom passed away last april. she was 61, i'm 28.

she had preeclampsia when she was pregnant with me. i was an only child, born at 6 months.

she had three strokes 11 years ago (edit: forgot what year it was. it was 2015, not 2017). she was partially paralized, on her left side, but still worked. she needed help with a couple of things, still, and walked with certain difficulty, but she was a fighter. she was optimistic, always had a smile on her face, brightened everyone's lives. her coworkers were at the funeral, they were crying with us. friends from uni days, friends from fucking kindergarten. she was so loved.

i lived with her and her husband. i live with my aunt, now. in a way, i helped mom through the divorce, through dad being a dirtbag. it was just us for a long time. in a way, it brought us closer.

people have told me i was a wonderful daughter. that i did everything right. that i was supportive, caring, sweet, always there for her. i feel it wasn't enough. that's not the point, though. it feels like my purpose in life is gone. i don't help anyone anymore, i don't bring anything good or worthy in other people's lives. i feel like a waste of space and fresh air. but i don't want to make my family go though another loss. my grandma passed 15 months ago. my mom passed a little over 6 months ago. what kind of person would i be for doing this to them? making them go through this again?

i just wish i could stop existing. i can't stand myself, i hate myself most of the time. i genuinely wish i could have a clone to just beat myself into a pulp. but i can't leave. and i can't hurt myself. so i'm just here.

I do wish that I wasn't born, so much suffering could've been avoided including my own... I also feel I am punished many times js bcz I was there or alive... Don't even know wht "live" Means Tbh... Nd yea I consider this a privilege, whining abt whtever is there. I'm conflicted.

Does anyone know or can attest that it gets better? I got off meds and thought I'm finally normal, turns out it just come back. I'm fucking tired of feeling this way and I feel like an absolute worthless loser and I see myself turning into someone again that I thought I overcomed. I want this to end pls

I- I don't even have the energy to explain my condition, I feel anxiety, rage , hopelessness running through my veins, well I wanted to end my life but I realised it's not possible, I go on with my life almost everyday but I lack any emotional support, everyday is a battle for me, i willingly go through it , I get proud of myself sometimes too but I'm tired , I'm really tired of being strong, I need emotional support, not pity , not sympathy, but softness, attunement, it feels hard to breath sometimes, it's hard to keep pushing myself to keep myself alive by pushing meds. I need peace, idk what shit I'm typing but I'm writing everything I'm feeling rn. I'm just not okay .

I'll have managed to surprise myself if I actually end up typing this whole thing out but here goes. I feel like I have nothing to live for. I'm only 19, I'm told I have my entire life ahead of me and that I'm just getting started. And frankly hearing that makes me both afraid and disgusted. I can't imagine living anywhere near twice as long as I already have let alone into old age. I already feel old. I feel like I've already lived my entire life. And as it is now I have basically no reason to keep going save for the hope that things could get better. But I know I could never trust myself to actually try to make things better.

I don't even feel sad and miserable all the time. I just feel dead inside. I hardly feel. I used to be much worse. Back in 2023, I was having constant panic attacks, screaming at the top of my lungs and sobbing every single night, constantly biting the shit out if my arm, beating and scratching myself. But not anymore. I went from fire to ashes. Now I just feel dead. I do still get constant horrific intrusive thoughts, but I've gotten used to them. I think about cutting myself sometimes but my mom took away my knife after she saw me pretending to swallow it. Thankfully I haven't done anything permanent to myself. Not saying I won't though. Scratched the hell out of my arm with a bottle cap the other day.

I live with my mom and her ex, who she's completely dependent on. The two are constantly arguing. Its harrowing. She's fine but he's a narcissist and a psychopath with a heart of thin air. Both he and I are dead inside but unlike him I used to have a heart, and it still beats sometimes. A flowery way of saying I still have basic human empathy. I feel uncomfortable talking about him like this because a part of me believes he'll somehow see this but who cares. Everyone in this house is miserable in their own way. My mom's in terrible shape physically and mentally. She's so stressed and overworked she's losing her hair. She's only able to cope through her faith and probably a bit of Stockholm syndrome.

I also live with my little sister, who used to be at the end of a rope before she decided to live out of spite. She hardly eats anything at all and looks quite literally like a starving Victorian child. And her brain didn't develop right because she was raised on a screen with unrestricted and unlimited access to the darkest corners of the internet while simultaneously suffering from abuse from her dad to the point where she hates being called by her own name and she would even constantly hallucinate demons in and around his room, which is also one of the reasons my mom sleeps on the couch. We also have a beloved cat but she has breast cancer and there's nothing anyone can or will do about it, so the cat just licks at it with her sandpaper tongue and gets blood everywhere she goes.

I try my hardest to escape it but I really can't. I spend basically all my time in my bedroom in the creepy basement online or playing video games so that I can pretend I live in a different world for a while. But I can hear everything upstairs from the arguing to the ridiculously loud and creaky floors. My only source of food is my also depressed uncle who cooks for me and always buys stuff for me despite being poor. My entire life, I've hardly ever left the house, after all I have no reason to. I've never had a single friend to do anything with. Most of my family is either dead or now distant. The only people in my life aside from the aforementioned are a small group of online friends who I barely know and rarely see. They're not really even friends, more so just acquaintances. I've never had a close friend and I doubt anyone would want to be friends with the real me rather than the person I pretend to be. I hardly have anyone I can act myself around. I don't even feel like I can be myself no matter what because I guess I have body dysphoria or something like that, and it's probably just going to get worse with age and there's nothing anyone on earth can or will do about it. Not looking like myself anymore is another reason I dread the future.

I don't even know if I could get myself out of this situation if I tried. I've never been to school a day in my life after about kindergarten, most of what I know being self taught. I was kind of homeschooled by my grandma until she got too sick and I ended up having to take care of her. Then she died and I ended up living here in a lukewarm hell. So without any proper or formal education what can I do? What could I do anyways? I couldn't manage hard labor and I'm too stupid to do anything else. I probably couldn't focus either between the constant horrific intrusive thoughts, adhd, and crippling ocd. Being autistic doesn't help either. I don't even have the necessary paperwork to be legally employed. And frankly regardless of what I could do to improve the situation I don't care anymore. I don't care about anything anymore. Not like I used to. Not even the things I once loved.

I just don't have the will for anything anymore. Something as simple as brushing my teeth when I wake up is difficult. Taking the time to brush my hair without ripping even more of it out is hard. Shaving my face, let alone the rest of me is hard. Picking my clothes up off the floor is hard. Taking a shower is hard. Even doing things I like is hard. Leaving the house for just a couple hours a week out of necessity nearly kills me. I only eat once or twice a day and even that feels like too much and not enough at the same time. When I barely can bring myself to live as I am, how could I possibly motivate myself to improve?

I used to have dreams, but now they feel more like pipe dreams. The only things I've ever wanted to do are things that won't get me anywhere in life, so what's the point in trying? I wanted to bring my dreams into reality by making a game, but that's not going to happen. I wanted to be an artist, I wanted to be a musician. I like to sing despite my monotonous voice. I even wanted to be something as impossible as a Knight like the ones I saw at the Renaissance Faire a while ago. I might as well have wanted to go to the moon. I don't see it happening not only because it's impossible, but because I just don't care enough to make it happen anymore. What's the point in trying to make a future for myself in the doomed hell world we call earth that relentlessly attacks people for just existing?

The best part is that this entire nine paragraph long post won't matter. If anyone even sees it or cares enough to reply it won't change anything. I've told this story a hundred times to several people and it never made a difference. It'll just go back to "normal" like always and because of my mood swings I'll soon stop wanting to kill myself and be laughing at some dumb memes like nothing ever happened and I'll forget I ever posted this until I go back to fantasizing about dying. It feels like I'm trapped in an endless monotonous cycle in everything I do. And if you actually read all this, thanks. Even if it won't matter in the end.

as the title suggests, i have decided this is what will bring me the most peace. i’m not posting this because i believe someone can stop me, i’m posting this because i am hoping someone can.

i know people say having hope means you’re not ready to give up, but i am. i shouldn’t be though, i have a cat who depends on me for everything and me dying would mean he has to go to a shelter and i don’t want that. but im finding that to even be too little of a reason for me to stay. someone mentally stable will give my baby a better life and i know he deserves that. i cant even be good enough for him.

i finished writing the notes to all the people i love
and i realized there are so many people that i love and that should be enough. but it’s not. even with my love for others, and even with the people i have in my life. i have never in my entire existence felt so alone.

i have been struggling with mental health issues since i was eight years old and all throughout i have heard “it gets better,” “give it a few years and i promise it’ll all be worth it,” “you’re so strong, just keep fighting a little longer.” but when does that “worth” ever come? when does it feel okay to exist.? my everyday is filled with the same thing, i am in a constant cycle of fighting my own brain. when does it end? or is the end a promise that is just meant to keep me here longer?

i thought that moving out was going to save me, i thought leaving my abusive family was what was going to make it better. but it’s still not better. in fact, i think it’s worse. i know im going to get judged for this but the only work i have been able to find is sex work. it started off as camming and that was fine, until i couldn’t do it sober. so i was consistently drunk and then that bled into my personal life, not just my work life, which fucked up my personal life. and now i’m doing irl sex work and i don’t think ive ever hated anything more. tw: rape i have been raped throughout my entire life, and somehow this feels even worse. it feels like i can no longer say no because i don’t want it but because now saying no means i wont be able to pay my rent. it’s fucking destroying me. i was so okay with it but now it just feels like everytime i log on or see them in person, more of me dies. i can’t stand this feeling. and not only that, it’s not even worth the money anymore, i am struggling to make rent every single month, i even had to ask my friend for money this month. and please for the love of peace, do not tell me to try to find another job, bc i have been trying. i have four years of work experience and have applied for upwards of 100 places and only heard back from two and both of them were saying that they’re not in the position to hire right now but when they are, i will hear from them. i’ve called so many places, i’ve went in person, trust i have tried. please know i have tried.

i don’t want to feel like this. the only way i can see peace coming to me, is in death and im okay with that. i just wish my death wouldn’t affect other people. i am just so tired. and i’m tired of being tired. i just want to feel peace. i just want to feel okay. but i can’t do that in life.

also apologies for this being all over the place, im not in the mental state to make this easier for you to read, im sorry.

god is not going to fix this. please do not bring that into either my dms or this post.

Hi there, I am m23 with severe ocd and depression, I am currently taking fluoxetine 60mg and antipsychotic too. But it seems like nothings working, I have changed medication in the past but that didn't helped, I really want to get out of this and live like a normal person but nothing works, sometimes I do feel like I need to quit everything and die, death seems more peaceful but can't do anything because I am worried about my family, my parents and sisters, I can't leave them alone, but I can't even live like this anymore, I am tired of everything, I can't do anything because everything seems to much hard, I can't share anything with my family because I don't want them to worry, what do I do?

Hi everyone, I’m in a very strange mental head space right now. For a bit of background, I live with extreme social anxiety and depression and I feel like I’m losing my will to live. I don’t really have any friends, but I do have a loving fiancé and great family.. I’m just really not wanting to live anymore. I am so scared of people and of the world. I’m too afraid to even get a job because I fear getting yelled at and struggle at following even the simplest instructions (most likely autistic but haven’t been formally diagnosed.) I went to universal Orlando today and got yelled at/laughed at by a cast member and it really affected me…like..I think all my emotions came out at once and I felt like there are just no redeeming qualities in people..i know im nowhere near perfect, but my anxiety makes me a people pleaser so i am overly kind and respectful to everyone, so getting treated like that at one of my favorite places in the world made me feel so ..distressed?? I know I’m being over dramatic, and I forgot to take my antidepressants earlier, but I am just finding it so hard to stay alive. I feel like this interaction today as almost pushed me over the edge into a sort of mental health crisis. The world seems so dark to me. People are so mean or just act like I’m not even there. For the rest of the day I’ve been too afraid to even make eye contact with others because I’m so terrified of them. I guess I just needed to rant and wanted some reassurance that there is some light in the world and that there are good people out there. I’m so angry at the world for being so mean and it’s just a lot of emotions at once. Thank you.

not seeking any attention/recognition but my birthday is coming up on the 22nd of nov. turning 28 years of age. i finally made the decision to leave earth in physical form. i know it will hurt my family but i am tired of constantly being this way. that is all. i love everyone who is going through something & i pray yall find some comfort in this world. bye

I got fired today. Now I have to serve 30-day notice period. My whole life seems to be in shambles. While firing my boss said I don't have ownership mindset. As a person belonging to an historically oppressed community I feel very alone and vulnerable right now. I don't know how to own mistakes. I've never been taught. All I've been taught is how to feel shame and guilt about it. I have no one to seek help to. I don't know who can help. I feel very depressed